Crying fit

I'm not crying over you.
I'm crying over me.
I bring these problems upon myself.

I always make the excuse that you hate me.
And that I can't be loved by you.

When in reality,
its not that.
Its this:
I hate myself.
And I don't love myself.

My internal problems with myself are causing me to think the world hates me...
that none of my friends like me. 

To be honest,
I don't feel like I'm mature enough for relationships with anyone right now.
And no, that's not in the sense of romantic relationships.
Human relationships in general.
Why should my friends have to love me if I don't even love me?

But at the same time,
this is when I need friends the most..
but I'm scared to say anything...